Food for thoughts…

I found that when you start achieving things and making differences, you hear different types of “wow!”

There are those who are genuinely in awe of you, there are those who just can’t believe it and there are those who never saw you coming. Regardless of what the “wow” means, you had to believe in your dream.

I think we can all agree that What truly matters is what you say to your self. I hope that this week you say to yourself that:

  • You can and you will
  • You matter
  • You are worthy of love, kindness, and respect
  • You can do all things
  • You are kind
  • You are smart
  • You are a beautiful human being
  • You can achieve your goals

Share what you would add to these affirmations below… And have an amazing week.

Let it go…

Have you done an inventory lately? What are you holding on to?

As for me, I’ve been reorganizing things and it is amazing the things that we hold onto just to feel secure. I learned that I’ve got to let go of some things in order to make room for greater, better things.

What would you let go off despite the hurt, to make room for better things?

cheers to an amazing and freeing week.

Forever Young…

What would the soundtrack of your life be? Would you write it or would you pick your favorite artist to sing it?

I re-read “Living Forward: A Proven Plan to Stop Drifting and Get the Life You Want” by Michael Hyatt & Daniel Harkavy a few weeks ago. If you are still confused about where you want to go in life and what you do, this might be a good start for you.

When I bought the book in 2016, I was embarking on what I thought was a journey that would lead me to fulfillment and Joy.  I felt that I was drifting and I wanted direction in my life. However, I read the book back then and barely did the exercises that were recommended. I put it on the shelf with the intention of revisiting it later.. almost 2 years later, here we are…  It could be that I am just getting old or it could be that I have been reading way too many self-help books but the need to take this seriously kicked in and I felt the need to do the exercises this time around… This is what I learned about me…

I want to be forever young…

“So let’s just stay in the moment… Leave a mark that can’t erase, neither space nor time. So when the director yells cut we’ll be fine”- Forever Young lyrics

Yes! every year, on my birthday, I am forever 21 but that’s not what I mean…

I want to be forever young in all my life accounts: In religion, family, career, friendships, hobbies, etc. I want to be as passionate, as eager to learn and as hungry for growth as I am on the first day of a new experience.

As I focus on the expectations that are set for me, I tend to feel like I am way behind, I become very impatient with myself and I tend to give into negative self-thoughts.

If I remember nothing else about my life plan, I want to remember to extend to myself and others some grace.

I will definitively write the soundtrack of my life, but when the director yells cut, I sure hope everyone that crossed my path remembers my “youth.”

 

On living a little…

In 2013, my philosophy was “Que sera, sera, whatever will be will be, the future’s not ours to see… que sera, sera…” (yes I still love the song and yes! I used to repeat those words to myself quite often)… Well, 2013 quickly became the year that I had to fight the most difficult internal battles and let’s just say that I now look back and ask myself “what on earth was I thinking?” It was not all bad, in fact, it was the year that I really started making my own life decisions. I was 25 (if you have traditional African parents, you will understand).

Why am I bringing this up? People have been telling me to live a little. While some of them are right (I do need to find more ways to have fun), Some of them were really confusing. For example, I am at a point in my life where I cannot justify spending over a certain amount of money on clothes, regardless of how good it looks on me. Yes! I work hard and no! that is not why I work hard.

In reflection, I realize that when I decided to adopt that philosophy in 2013, I also stopped dreaming. I stopped living intentionally and I let life happen to me and it was really the worst thing I could have ever done at such a prime time of my life.

As I am approaching another decade of my life, I know that I AM LIVING.  I am choosing to be intentional about every aspect of my life (spiritual, career, financial, social, family, physical and personal development) because…

“Where water is the boss there the land must obey.” — African proverb

God has the final say but there is a reason why we have to ask before we receive. While it is not always fun to say no to “living a little,” keeping my “why” in mind is a great reminder that it will be worth it in the end.

“Excellence is never an accident. It is always the result of high intention, sincere effort, and intelligent execution; it represents the wise choice of many alternatives – choice, not chance, determines your destiny.”
— Aristotle

Exercising my joy muscle

I am challenging myself to read more this year. For February I picked up The Book of Joy and it brought me as much laughter and as much joy the title promised. Not only was this a conversation between his Holiness Dalai Lama (Buddhist), Archbishop Desmond Tutu (Christian) and Douglas Abrams (Jewish) but also, the author successfully relayed the camaraderie between the spiritual leaders interviewed in the book. 2018-02-13 07.36.29

I have many highlights in the book but in this month of love where we are prone to beat ourselves up for falling short on our goals or resolutions, I appreciated the reminder that Joy is a choice.

I was reminded that like any choice that I make, it is possible that I am constantly challenged to change my mind and choose something else. However, this is where I should be OK with being selfish.

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So here we go…

I, Raya Bayor promise to #SHARETHEJOY, see the world through joyful eyes to find the beauty in everything, appreciate everyone and let HAPPINESS be my guide to hug strangers along the way, hold dearly onto their stories and have the courage to let go of my own. To find one another, to feel and to let joy surround me. This is my pledge.

 

On getting validation

If you are like me, you question everything. It is very hard to take that first step unless I see the full picture and I know exactly where I am headed.  Well! my world stopped when I realized that I had to go to Chicago for a week. It was my first time being away from my baby and it was like pulling a tooth for me. Every step leading to the trip was painful, however, I went…

Right before a snowstorm and freezing temperature so I did not see much of Chicago. However, I accomplished the mission that took me there, I completed my first residence in the Social Work program, yay!

As painful as the whole process was, I am glad I went because I left Chicago feeling confident about my skills as a Social Worker and I also got the validation that I am on the right track.

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I did not realize that I was seeking validation for what I chose as a path for my career and I realized that (thanks to the amazing people I spent the week with)  I have not given myself permission to be Social Worker because I am interested in so many other things.  I was terrified of wearing that title because I am interested in doing many other things and I did not want to limit myself.  I made peace with the idea that my abilities are limitless and I can wear as many titles as I want.

Do you find yourself raising walls around you and resisting to grandiose dreams? well, I learned this lesson this week and I am sharing it with you: DON’T!

New Year, New You!

I don’t recall who said this exactly but I remember that she was asked how she is doing in the new year and she said “same s@$t different year.”  I still find that amusing…

How are you feeling so far? Did you have new year resolutions? Are you still on track?

I learned a few years ago that goals work better than resolutions. I also learned that I am more likely to succeed when I focus on one thing at a time. So I set quarterly goals. The first quarter of 2018, I want to eat better because as Jim Rohn said…

PS: One of the life-changing videos I’ve watched is a workshop that Jim Rohn did and I watched it Here.

Here is a shortlist that I found motivational to stick to my goals…

Achieving-your-goals-1
Found Here

On fear…

 

Fear
Found Here

Last week I listened to Marie Forleo and Tim Ferriss. I enjoyed their conversation mainly because it was on topics that I am interested in. You can watch their conversation here 

 

I have been thinking about all the things that I fear lately (the list is longer than I like) so I searched online to see what is suggested to those of us who fear, and some suggestions really made me laugh out loud: live vicariously, face your fear, journal your fear, yeah ok!

Tim Ferriss suggests that we do “fear setting” rather than set goals. I thought it was quite innovative and kind of therapeutic because, at the end of the exercise, I had a plan for this particular fear which was related to money. I hope you find the time to watch his Ted talk

Where are you going?

Recently I was feeling down for many reasons but mainly because “Gosh! can a girl catch a break?”

But! This girl has a problem, I have been trying to make friend with patience.

Hurry, hurry has no blessings. ~ Swahili proverb

A lovely woman read my horoscope out loud (usually not a horoscope believer but I was playing along that day). I remember it said something similar to “you might not be where you planned to be but stay focused and remember where you are headed.”

Last year I watched one of Jim Rohn’s teachings on Youtube and I wrote my goals. As life got in the way, my goals went out of sight for a moment and I was grateful for that voice that reminded me to go back and look at it.

“Setting goals is the first step in turning the invisible into the visible.” Tony Robbins

Where are you going? And if what you are doing now taking you anywhere close to your ultimate goal?

Speaking of which? Have you put your goal on paper and how often do you revisit it?

Quotes keep me motivated and I hope you enjoy the ones that I added to my post.

Stay focused, go after your dreams and keep moving toward your goals. LL Cool J