Regrets… where?

Happy Monday!

To many of us, this is the beginning of a new week, new commitment, new beginnings, etc… I wish you more progress than discouragements this week.

Something that I am pondering on is my purpose in life. I want to make sure that I am headed the right way. So I have been asking myself what I do what I do for? In other words, what are my intentions and am I doing what I can to have the ending that I desire?

Some of you might find my thoughts too morbid but I truly believe that this exercise helps me make better decisions in life. I find a lot of peace in knowing that I lived wholeheartedly so far.  Yes! I have regrets but I did not know any better. Now that I know better, I am doing better…

“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.”
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

Every day is a new day…

This entire week, I was uplifted by the lyrics of the song that I am sharing today… Not necessarily a big fan of the saying “TGIF”  because my wish is that we all feel awesome about our lives every single day of the week.

I still hope that these word make you smile and that you dance a little or a lot this weekend and every day…

“Let the rain come down and wash away my tears
Let it fill my soul and drown my fears
Let it shatter the walls for a new, new sun…” Stephan Richard Moccio and Aldo Nova wrote the lyrics and Celine Dion sang it…

On living a little…

In 2013, my philosophy was “Que sera, sera, whatever will be will be, the future’s not ours to see… que sera, sera…” (yes I still love the song and yes! I used to repeat those words to myself quite often)… Well, 2013 quickly became the year that I had to fight the most difficult internal battles and let’s just say that I now look back and ask myself “what on earth was I thinking?” It was not all bad, in fact, it was the year that I really started making my own life decisions. I was 25 (if you have traditional African parents, you will understand).

Why am I bringing this up? People have been telling me to live a little. While some of them are right (I do need to find more ways to have fun), Some of them were really confusing. For example, I am at a point in my life where I cannot justify spending over a certain amount of money on clothes, regardless of how good it looks on me. Yes! I work hard and no! that is not why I work hard.

In reflection, I realize that when I decided to adopt that philosophy in 2013, I also stopped dreaming. I stopped living intentionally and I let life happen to me and it was really the worst thing I could have ever done at such a prime time of my life.

As I am approaching another decade of my life, I know that I AM LIVING.  I am choosing to be intentional about every aspect of my life (spiritual, career, financial, social, family, physical and personal development) because…

“Where water is the boss there the land must obey.” — African proverb

God has the final say but there is a reason why we have to ask before we receive. While it is not always fun to say no to “living a little,” keeping my “why” in mind is a great reminder that it will be worth it in the end.

“Excellence is never an accident. It is always the result of high intention, sincere effort, and intelligent execution; it represents the wise choice of many alternatives – choice, not chance, determines your destiny.”
— Aristotle

Exercising my joy muscle

I am challenging myself to read more this year. For February I picked up The Book of Joy and it brought me as much laughter and as much joy the title promised. Not only was this a conversation between his Holiness Dalai Lama (Buddhist), Archbishop Desmond Tutu (Christian) and Douglas Abrams (Jewish) but also, the author successfully relayed the camaraderie between the spiritual leaders interviewed in the book. 2018-02-13 07.36.29

I have many highlights in the book but in this month of love where we are prone to beat ourselves up for falling short on our goals or resolutions, I appreciated the reminder that Joy is a choice.

I was reminded that like any choice that I make, it is possible that I am constantly challenged to change my mind and choose something else. However, this is where I should be OK with being selfish.

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So here we go…

I, Raya Bayor promise to #SHARETHEJOY, see the world through joyful eyes to find the beauty in everything, appreciate everyone and let HAPPINESS be my guide to hug strangers along the way, hold dearly onto their stories and have the courage to let go of my own. To find one another, to feel and to let joy surround me. This is my pledge.

 

On getting validation

If you are like me, you question everything. It is very hard to take that first step unless I see the full picture and I know exactly where I am headed.  Well! my world stopped when I realized that I had to go to Chicago for a week. It was my first time being away from my baby and it was like pulling a tooth for me. Every step leading to the trip was painful, however, I went…

Right before a snowstorm and freezing temperature so I did not see much of Chicago. However, I accomplished the mission that took me there, I completed my first residence in the Social Work program, yay!

As painful as the whole process was, I am glad I went because I left Chicago feeling confident about my skills as a Social Worker and I also got the validation that I am on the right track.

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I did not realize that I was seeking validation for what I chose as a path for my career and I realized that (thanks to the amazing people I spent the week with)  I have not given myself permission to be Social Worker because I am interested in so many other things.  I was terrified of wearing that title because I am interested in doing many other things and I did not want to limit myself.  I made peace with the idea that my abilities are limitless and I can wear as many titles as I want.

Do you find yourself raising walls around you and resisting to grandiose dreams? well, I learned this lesson this week and I am sharing it with you: DON’T!

New Year, New You!

I don’t recall who said this exactly but I remember that she was asked how she is doing in the new year and she said “same s@$t different year.”  I still find that amusing…

How are you feeling so far? Did you have new year resolutions? Are you still on track?

I learned a few years ago that goals work better than resolutions. I also learned that I am more likely to succeed when I focus on one thing at a time. So I set quarterly goals. The first quarter of 2018, I want to eat better because as Jim Rohn said…

PS: One of the life-changing videos I’ve watched is a workshop that Jim Rohn did and I watched it Here.

Here is a shortlist that I found motivational to stick to my goals…

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Found Here